The outcome took me by surprise
I was offered the opportunity
Right there, right then
No need to fight or compete for it
I would’ve liked to have been chosen on merit rather than out of desperation
But you know what?
I made myself sick from anxiety
Here was my ticket to escape from where I’d made myself unhappy
But it didn’t feel right
I was questioning my thoughts, feelings, motivations
Was I doing this for the right reasons?
My words did not match my truth
So I started writing about what I wanted and also what I did not want to repeat
And talking to my friend helped heaps
She gave me good advice
And I got clarity from the 9.9.9 portal info she sent me
So I went with what felt right and made me feel calm
And things worked out in the end.